Friday, 4 February 2011

Time Machine is Out of Order

The other day, whilst walking to the tube, I almost stole some children. It was an impulse emotion, undoubtedy sparked by their cuteness. I mean, they were the most adorable children I had ever seen. A brother and a sister, with ashy blond hair and bright eyes filled with giggles. They ran up and down the street in front of their mother, who trailed behind pushing the stroller.

The odds were against me. I knew I didn't have a good chance of a successful kiddie-heist and I knew they would probably quickly become an unnecessary financial burden, so I kept walking to the tube.

I also knew that it was probably wrong to steal children. Yes, I'm pretty sure I knew that.

The area surrounding South Kensington tube station is like a battlefield covered with landmines of unhealthy temptations. I had to navigate my way past Hummingbird Bakery, Ben's Cookies and Miss Ellie's. That's Yummy Evil, Scrumptious Evil and Mouthwatering Slightly-Less-Evil, respectively.

One of these do-das is a
time machine!
Once I made it past the Demons-of-Deliciousness, through the barriers and down the escalator, I reached train-level with a couple minutes to spare. A train must have just left, as the platform was completely empty. I walked down towards the opposite end, passing by one of the Cadbury candy dispensers. An out of order sign was taped to the front of the machine. Or at first, that's what I thought it was. But upon closer examination, I found that this one read:

Time machine is out of order

That made me giggle. And then the dispenser face swung down and smashed against the wall below. The clatter rang down the still empty platform. Inside the machine was a rather uncomfortable and cramped looking seat.  The seat-belt wasn't reassuring with is many straps and  In front of the seat, a canvas of random buttons and knobs flashed frantically

And then I wondered...

...to be continued.

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